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Summer arrived in Finland

Friday, May 19, 2017


Hej, everyone! What a wonderful sunny and summerish day it has been! It has been so warm today that I didn't even need a jacket and it felt really weird to leave my woolen cardigan at home for the first time after the long winter months. 20 degrees and the warm summer sun made the forest look so very magical today! The white dots of the anemone nemurosas on the green forest floor made it look like in a fairytale. Polly and I went for a photo walk and took many pictures between pine trees and flowers which I can't wait to share with you in the coming days. 

After my last post, I instantly started to feel better! I was extremely nervous to publish my feelings and thoughts and have already been prepared for some negative comments, but oh my, I want to thank you all for your kindness and sweet reaction. I would have never expected to get such an understanding response from you. So many people could relate to my situation and so many sent me some kind wishes and words. I was really overwhelmed by all the love I received. 


So right after I wrote this long post, which I spent quite a few hours with since I added and deleted and changed the text a few times because while I was writing I processed all the struggles and re-thought things, I felt much better. I gave myself a therapy by writing down what bothered me and while I was writing I came to the conclusion that this is not what I wanted. I wanted to be happy again, and it might sound weird, but my heart lifted somehow and a weight has been taken from my chest. Since then days have been way better! After weeks of avoiding going to bed I could finally fall asleep again without sadness, anxiety or insomnia. I sleep well again and the mornings are less frightening again. The sun is shining, the air smells like summer and I am feeling good. It feels so good to be back on track. 


So now I am looking forward to two weeks I have left here in Helsinki. They are filled with meetings and adventures, starting with me taking photos of a friend of mine and his band tomorrow in the woods. Also I will go to the botanical garden next week with Mia, visit Fia in Tallinn to explore the city and do music together and might also do a boat trip with some Finnish photographers which I am really excited about! I am planning a Goodbye- picnic with all my friends, want to go to Tampere, and just enjoy the last days with the people I love. As you can see, the last weeks here are filled with adventures and nice people. I enjoy every second even more, now that I know that my time is limited. It makes things even more precious. 


These are some more of the photos Majbritt and I took in Nuuksio when she visited me. It is so lovely to look at them and remember the hilarious moments we spent wandering through the woods. Now I will go to sleep, although my body is still pretty energized because it is still light outside although it is almost 11 pm. Oh, I am so excited because of the happy feeling inside of me. It feels so strange to have it back, but so much more I enjoy it! I hope you had a wonderful Friday! Do you have any plans for the weekend? Please let me know! Lots of love to you! 

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Illustrations by Emily Stelten